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Boyhood Heroes

by The Jangleberries

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1.
7:52 03:11
lyrics
She calls for radon as the china clay train leaves I wake up from a dream which later nobody believes I hear a goblin burbling through my bedroom wall I swear sometimes I get no sleep at all Good morning! Good morning! 7:52 Good morning! Good morning! 7:52 I rise eight minutes earlier now I'm old enough to shave Every week I wake up one week closer to the grave "How many balls has Hitler?" whistles Christmas in my head Every day the same until I'm dead, oh yeah! Good morning! Good morning! 7:52 Good morning! Good morning! 7:52
2.
Boyhood Heroes 02:52
lyrics
Geoff Crammond and Ronnie Corbett Johnny Ball and David Stewart Jean Alesi and Johnny Herbert David Braben and Malcolm Barnecutt Are all my boyhood heroes All my boyhood heroes Warren Clarke and Colin Buchanan Martin Short and Neil Hannon Dennis Taylor and Kyle MacLachlan Jack Klugman and Patrick McGoohan, PATRICK McGOOHAN! PATRICK McGOOHAN!! Are all my boyhood heroes All my boyhood heroes All my boyhood heroes Are all my boyhood heroes All the people that I like Are like the people that I like And all the people that I like Like the people that I like And my brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad My brother and my sister and my mum and my dad
3.
Births and Deaths and Marriages 03:16
lyrics
Add them to the Christmas list Births and deaths and marriages Births and deaths and marriages Are coming round again Reg has passed away Maureen didn't say When I saw her yesterday Though she was looking grey... Friday with the Cornish Times Smudging ink and drawing lines Strike them off the Christmas list Births and deaths and marriages Births and deaths and marriages Are coming round again Maureen's doing fine I saw her in the Carlton With Jim from number 9 He doesn't waste much time... Friday with the Cornish Times Smudging ink and drawing lines Move them on the Christmas list Births and deaths and marriages Births and deaths and marriages Are coming round again Happy to report Seven pounds and nought Now the trousers that you bought Already seem too short... Friday with the Cornish Times Smudging ink and marking time Add them to the Christmas list Births and deaths and marriages Births and deaths and marriages Are coming round again Write them on the Christmas list Births and deaths and marriages Births and deaths and marriages Are coming round again
4.
Just Like the Beatles 02:41
lyrics
Yesterday I woke at ten Went to town came home again Played some records with my friends Just like the Beatles I boiled the kettle endlessly Listened to the BBC Then I dunked my biscuits in my tea Just like the Beatles So girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Yeah girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Yesterday I cut my hair The mop top makes me look less square An old man told me what to wear Just like the Beatles I bought myself a sharp black suit Got a pair of chelsea boots My sister says I look real cute Just like the Beatles So girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Yeah girl, whatever you see in them, see in me I've never witnessed a girl so fair Yes I feel bigger than Jesus when I see her standing there God if you're listening, answer my prayer So baby later if you find You look at me and change your mind I'll take you out and treat you kind Just like the Beatles So girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Yeah girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Oh girl, whatever you see in them, see in me Yeah girl, whatever you see in them, see in me
5.
Crackers and Cheese 03:20
lyrics
I am my own personal Jeeves Stiff upper lip, with a heart on both sleeves When the world brings me to my knees When the world brings me to my knees I say slippers, dressing gown, crackers and cheese Slippers, dressing gown, crackers and cheese I am an easy man to please Thank you, for putting me at ease When the world brought me to my knees When the world it brought me to my knees Slippers, dressing gown, crackers and cheese Slippers, dressing gown, crackers and cheese If you please Speaking words of wisdom, let it brie, oh yeah Speaking words of wisdom, let it brie, oh yeah Speaking words of wisdom, let it brie, oh yeah Speaking words of wisdom, let it brie, let it brie, let it brie
6.
She Was Terribly Mistaken 02:31
lyrics
Where you off to, now you're on your own? If you're feeling melancholy, you shouldn't be alone I thought it was a comedy until her lover died Have a tissue, dry your eyes The witty anti-hero was nothing like the book He came in like Buster Keaton, but then he drank like Peter Cook It was a tragicomic tragedy with the comedy removed Herman Munster would approve If you're still upset tomorrow, there's a matinee Burt Reynolds plays a man who drives across the USA I've heard its central thesis fails to satisfy But it's exceedingly unlikely that you'll cry Oh yeah, she was terribly mistaken She was terribly mistaken
7.
The Evil Vegan 02:42
lyrics
The evil vegan pulls the heads off flies while no-ones looking And the evil vegan laughs if someone dies while he is cooking He says: "Sometimes it's hard to be nice sometimes, God knows it's hard to be nice sometimes" The evil vegan loves his mum and always does the dishes But the evil vegan finds chaos and disruption more delicious He says: "Sometimes it's hard to be nice sometimes, God knows it's hard to be nice sometimes" Is evil evil if no-one ever knows? I dunno, I don't know Is evil evil, if nothing ever shows? 'Cos if it isn't, the evil vegan isn't evil, he's just vegan Sometimes it's hard to be nice sometimes God knows, it's hard to be nice sometimes
8.
You're a Secretary 02:30
lyrics
Your dad's on Top of the Pops And your mum's got twenty shops And your uncle is a NASA space crusader Your sister's on the screen And your brother's Charlie Sheen And your auntie's flying spaceships for Darth Vader But you're a secretary You're a secretary And I'm a secretary too, oh look at you Your friends are heads of banks And your son is Shabba Ranks And your daughter is the future queen of Spain Your neighbour's on the moon And your nephew makes perfume And your niece has got the worlds most clever brain, all the same You're a secretary You're a secretary I'm a secretary too You're a secretary You're a secretary I'm a secretary too
9.
I Could Have Been Prime Minister 03:07
lyrics
One day I'll be chancellor I'll spend it all on cups of tea The boffins at the treasury Will look at me aghast They'll debate my failing policy On Channel 4 and ITV The dandies at the BBC Will look at me and laugh Oh what a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh such a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister One day I'll be chancellor I'll speak in abstract poetry The terrified Home Secretary Will look and me and cry I'll turn up with no trousers on And work out all the numbers wrong As honest as the day is long On winter nights I'll lie Oh what a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh what a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh what a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh such a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh such a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister Oh what a terrible shame I could have been Prime Minister But I never, never, never, never, never. never wanted the job No I never, never, never, never, I never wanted the job Yeah I never, never, never, never, never. never wanted the job Oh I never, never, never, never, never. never wanted the job
10.
When You Least Expect It 02:44
lyrics
I'll see you again, when you least expect it Standing in your local holding two jugs of beer With a grin from ear to ear, oh, I'll be welcomed like a poorly timed bronx cheer Smelling just the same I'll see you again, when you least expect it Standing in your kitchen holding two cups of tea Cracked, dirty porcelain for you While Fulham play away for me Aa-ah Close your eyes and count to three Open wide, surprise, it's the man you least expected to see! Yeah, I'll see you again, when you least expect it Counting all the ways we think that we might have changed Why do you always look the same? In your absence, you age within my brain Aa-ah Close your eyes and count to three Open wide, surprise, it's the man you least expected to see!
11.
I Can Help You Claim Your Tax 03:15
lyrics
Hold your ironing boards, Non sequiturs are coming back I walk through Yorkshire Avoiding terrierist attacks But I can help you claim your tax Until the feeling's gone I can help you claim your tax The cat was barking As the dog began to pur The cows, they all wear leather But the mink, they all wear fur But I can help you claim your tax Until the feeling's gone I can help you claim your tax Well I hope it never goes! Oh yeah, that's how it always is Well I hope it never goes Oh yeah, that's how it always is Hold your astrolabe The renaissance it's a-coming back Well they call it wisdom But it sounds like random crap And I can help you claim your tax Until the feeling's gone I can help you claim your tax Well I hope it never goes!! Oh yeah, that's how it always is Well I hope it never goes Oh yeah, that's how it always is Oooooooooooooh
12.
You Loved The Sun 03:27
lyrics
You loved the sun And when you found a patch You'd lie and sleep for hours Feeling the sun As it warmed you And your dreams of things that I could never know I was young and you were young as well Now I'm older, you're no longer here You loved the chair That you'd rest upon And ponder things for hours Then when you'd wake And you'\d raise your head Peer out the window at your whole life Things you loved would change and move around Then they'd vanish and you'd wonder why I listen for your footsteps As you're coming up the stairs A reflection in the window But you're no longer there There came a time when I moved away And saw you less and less Near the end I would hold you but it hurt And you were too tired to complain I never had a chance to say goodbye But real friends never have to say goodbye Goodbye You loved the sun

about

The alarm went off every day at six thirty, but The Jangleberries used to get up at exactly the same time every morning: 7:52. No earlier, no later, and always alone. In between was the only time a young secretary got to think.

Could Carol Vorderman help you claim your tax? What if you asked her, just like the Beatles, but she answered with a consonant and then a vowel? I humbly suggest that you would never get over it, and you must admit that she could have been prime minister if she hadn't grown up to be terribly right wing. You hear a voice, but refuse to stir.

A friend of mine was writing a headline for the newspaper, and I said "you need a bigger space between Births and and and and and Deaths, and Deaths and and and and and marriages". He said I was mistaken, but it was still five "ands" in a row, twice, with an extra "and" for good measure. You roll over in bed and smile.

Most vegans are lovely, but when needs must, how do you insult an evil vegan? "You silly sausage" and "you haven't even got a pork shoulder to cry on" are both too hard to digest. Perhaps you could scare them off with crackers and cheese, but not until later.

Hold your ironing boards! It surely can't be that time already? When you least expect it, you rise towards the sun you have always loved, where a new day and a toothbrush beckon. See you at the sink.

Yours with love as ever,

The Jangleberries

who wish to thank (Top of the Pops with): Ben Garnett, Derek Leinweber, Monsieur Blanc, Claus Frolich, Gus Honeybun and His Announcer, John Bercow, Carol Vorderman, unknown Countdown contestant of genius, Patrick McGoohan, all at the Cornish Times, Ruffles, Top Cat, and their brother and their sister and their mum and their dad.

credits

released January 14, 2017

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The Jangleberries Adelaide, Australia

The Jangleberries are an offshoot of the English indie pop band Roadside Poppies. The band formed in Adelaide in 2014.

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